Saturday, May 2, 2015

Pray, Pray, Pray

Sitting in my yard this afternoon listening to a whippoorwill and the gentle sound of water flowing into my neighbor's pool; I watch flames from a small fire that is burning. I'm burning items that have been gathered, collected, and stored for far too many years... to the point of their decay. Items that very well may have retained their value had they been properly maintained.

Memories surface... "if 'he'd cared more..." I begin to intertwine myself with "his" lack of care for those things improperly maintained. I lump myself into the same category of "things" uncared for.  Stinging memories. I sit and watch the fire.

What to do?  I know I cannot take back, redo, undo, or change what's been done or who did the doing. I'm learning (again) I can only submit myself to the One in Whom all things consists.

I am reminded of my sister's words to me -- she said they were 'my words to her many years ago,' words I've long forgotten - "Pray, pray, pray. No matter what the situation sis, you always told me to pray, pray, pray."

Sitting in my yard under a large shade tree, the fire I'd watched earlier is now smoldering, I hear birds chirping, I see a little yellow butterfly fluttering about checking out all of the flowers to see which has the best nectar.   Ah, the wonders of God. I'm reminded about the Lord's words "Pray for those who use you and hurt you*" [*paraphrased]. No amount of anger, worry, pain, venomous words spoken can change those who inflict pain, nor remove the pain that was inflicted.

Jesus knew this well - that is why He told us to pray for others. I am reassured inside my heart and mind: He knows this is where true peace and power reside: our prayers float to heaven, they reach the throne of God and to His very heart, and the Supreme One will have His perfect will.

Thoughts of the importance of forgiveness surface in my mind. Memories which brought stinging pain a few minutes ago, lessen, the heart softens, much like many of the items that are burning in the fire will become... soft ash.

A pair of doves just flew into my yard and landed into a shady area of grass that is beyond the edge of where the fire is smoldering. How timely that a pair of doves appear: His peace, His power.

What to do? Pray, pray, pray.

Oh, Lord should I speak, may my words to my friends, family, neighbors, and strangers be kind words, words filled with compassion, the same compassion I was shown by God when my pain seemed unbearable.

The Lord knows of our afflictions, He hears our cries, He knows our sorrows (Exo 3:7). Jesus is acquainted with grief. In fact, He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows. He was oppressed, and He was afflicted for us. By His suffering we are healed (Isa 53:3-5).

Pray, pray, pray... to the Great One. For it is God alone who grants peace, has all power, and is the great Healer (of our own hearts and hearts of others who cause pain)

Sunday, September 29, 2013

Looking Out From Within

Turn on around and come on down from there; come along now, there is nothing to fear. 

Why are you sitting there?  What's your intent? Just turn to Me, take heed, don't be slow.

What? Yes, I am here and have been all along.  Standing patiently by, even though you think your are all alone. 

I've been at your side, my arm around you.  Have you forgotten I am your support?

It's okay.  Turn around, reach for my hand.  Now take a step, don't slow.  Each step -- though heavy may be -- will move you along on the path set for thee, which is closer to Me.

Turn around now.  Come on my friend.  I'm with you here; watching you, keeping you, there's no need to fear.

Saturday, September 14, 2013

Tears of a Hurting Soul

It is raining today. A steady, gentle down pour from the sky. No wind, just rain drops.  Much like the tears flowing forth from the eyes of a hurting soul. 

Many are the tears of humanity; tears, which are stored in heaven ["...put thou my tears into Thy bottle: are they not in Thy book?" Psalms 56:8].  This morning it is as if heaven has opened and has allowed those tears to stream down to the earth.

The rains must come, it is Your cycle for springing forth life to the earth, softening hard ground, allowing flowers to bloom, grasses to thrive, rivers to swell, and birds to drink.

O emotions of mine do not hinder the rain.  Let it pour.  Don't hold it back, less a hardened soul be formed.   For as rains come from heaven to bring forth life, may they come and soften  my heart so it will bloom, thrive, swell, and drink of the good things of God.

I know You know and I know You care. Thank you for reminding me of how near You really are when I get to the place of thinking You are far.  

Lord, help me to cast my burden upon You today.

Friday, September 13, 2013

Who Am I?

Who am I when the world completely halts?
No TV,

Just me.

No car to go,
to store or show;

Just me.

Do I know who I am?
When all is quiet and confinement is my stay?
Will I be able to distinguish my way, The way?

When the darkness goes out,
Will I see the light?
Which alone can keep me from fright.

Trauma within, for many a year.
I failed to know,
It was pushed far deep down below.

Who am I, alone? Just me?

No, I am a sojourner,
I'm His,
Visiting, I see.

Laugh O' my soul, sing aloud.
And watch the darkness move on as a cloud.

O' soul, get quiet.
For when the vapor is gone and all tis left is a faded flower,

I, who is me, and am in He,
without doubt, will see...
in that triumphant hour.

Set worry aside, and let Faith take her stand,
for I am His now and also be will when the journey here ends.

It is coming, however soon, it will surely take place... declares the Supreme and Sovereign Power. (Ezekiel 39:8)

Friday, September 9, 2011

Weep Not For Me

Weep not for me,
Said she to me,
Not for me,
For I shall see
That Wonderful Face of He.

The One who died to set us free from pain, death, and misery.

Rejoice for me,
Sing praise to Him
For you and I will meet again.

It may be here,
Or it may be there,
Near The Crystal Sea
Where outstretched Arms
Await for WE.
My friend, always know,
It's never about you,
Nor about me...

...But, always about the One
Who hung on the tree.

Hung He did on that appointed day
His crowned-head high above all
His blood flowing down
Both to allow man's entrance to
The Way.

"Weep not for me," she said to me,
"No, give praise to Him."

Today, our view, at best is dim...
For in our appointed time,
We shall not just each other again, but Him, face to face.

Monday, May 30, 2011

For By Him and Him Alone...

By Him and His will I was created and have my being.

"By Him and His will all things were created and have their being." (Rev. 4:11)

Thoughts, conceptions too difficult to comprehend, to understand from a human standpoint. So I will simply believe what I read, and as said, let it be.

Ah, few words... I am His... as are we all.

Words read this morning bring peace, comfort whosever trusts in the Lord is kept safe. Fear of man will prove to be a snare..(Prov 29:25)

Have been there. Tis true.

Narrow and lowley sighted is the source of this fear. Fear of rejection of that which can be seen -- yet it can dissepate with the node of a Head, wave of the Hand, or the slightest breath from One's Nostril.

I was young, now I'm older -- relation with the One who cannot be seen -- this is the goal, where acceptance can be found, where real treasure lies, where beauty exists, and from where peace and true comfort come. Trust.

Jonah to the Almighty God of heaven and earth...

Those who cling to worthless idols forfeit the grace that could be theirs...And the Lord commanded the fish...

God to Jonah...

But Nineveh has...people...who cannot tell their right hand from their left...should I [God] not be concerned...?

As should I. It's not about me. No, but Thee. Fear not what people do or say. Again, yea, trust in Him Who cannot be seen. For those who can be seen are just like me. In need. He knows.

For By Him and His will all things were created and have their being. Look to Him. He holds the key.

A clear mind - a quiet mind, gifts in themself... to hear that Still and Small Voice.

In quietness and confidence lies strength (parah, Isa 30:15)

Oh quietness to hear and
trusting confidence for strength.

For By You and Your will alone was I created and have my being.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

A Want To...

Oh God for Your strength --
My "want to"* is shallow,
No substance,
No ground.

I know there is more.
I see it all around...
...At a distance...
Though, 'ner coming close,
Nor crossing the invisible...
...Parameter which around me surrounds.

To you alone I cry,
No one else can bring change.
Even I let my own self down.

O help me Dear God.

Grace and Strength to do,
To be,

To live,
To see,
To have a solid
"want to."


May desires, goals,
vision, aspirations, and dreams burst forth.  I know there is more.

*inspired from a sentence in the book entitled "Made to Crave" written by Lysa TerKeurst.

Thursday, February 10, 2011


Oh, I am soooo stuck,


As if my world has stopped.

Try as I may to make a go of things - going places and being with people (friends of old and friends of new ) - it seems that little pans out.

I resolve to simply do what must be done day to day... my younger son, my home, my yard, my job, stay in touch with older son, read the Word, talk with the great Shepherd.

I praise Him, sing, think upon Him, how good He is, thank Him for where He's brought me from, what He's delivered me from, thank Him for what I have. Pray for others and situations as they come to mind.

I "know" the saying: "You are as happy as you want to be."

I know God is my help, my strength, my provider, my joy, my all... and His grace is sufficient for me.

I pray the prayer of David... "Oh Father...restore unto me the joy of Thy salvation, take not Thy Holy Spirit from me." And I thank Him for His grace which is all sufficient and for now and that which is to come.

Just sharing from my stuck place today.

Other than the items shared above, I know not what to do.

A friend told me recently she learned finally to "grow where she was planted."

Given that, I will stay where I am and continue to seek, ask, pray, and soak in the "Sonshine", and learn, by His grace, to be content.

It is certainly better than being stuck in the mud. And WHO KNOWS WHAT GOOD THINGS ARE YET TO BLOOM?

Monday, January 17, 2011

Friend, You May Not Know...

Dear Friend, though I do not see you as often as I'd like, life always seems to pick up where we left off the last time we saw each other; and, when together, it is as if a day had not passed from the last time together.

I love you friend. 

Friends make up some of the most precious threads that are woven into my life's tapestry.  
  • Friend, you may not remember the prayer you prayed with me, but I do.
  • You may not remember the time you hugged me extra hard because you saw I might need it, but I do.
  • You may not remember the time you offered your hand to me, but I do.
  • You may not remember the invitation you extended me, but I do.
  • You may not remember the time I came, stayed, and ate at your home, but I do.  
Friend, you may not know, but, I love you.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Potter's Hand

Potter's Hand

" the clay is in the potter's hand, so are ye in mine hand...." Jeremiah 18:6

The Potter loves His work, as Jesus love me.

The Potter is patient with His work, as Jesus is with me.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Abiding in Him Means Love...

To obey is better than sacrifice...
Obey what I ask of Thee?
To love your neighbor, and
Above all love Me.

Long ago, when My only begotten Son walked among man,
He Himself said His 'meat' was to do My will,
So, how much better for you my child even still.

It is My will that you be free, free from oppression, free to live,
Free to love, you know, simply free to be.

But, so many times it doesn't seem to me that I am free, and I certainly do not always show love.
That's because you are looking at what you can see and not at Me.

I assure you, My love, which is perfect, casts out all fear and it never fails.
This love of which I speak cannot be mustered from within,
No, it is poured into your heart through the Holy Spirit;
You know, the one Who teaches, lets you know what is to come, and convicts of sin.

So giving things up, and being nice to people, and doing things for them does not indicate love?
Only when done by Me through you.
See you love Me, because I first loved you.
And without Me you can do nothing... and that includes loving one another. 
For without Me, love does not exist.
I am love.

To love is to keep My commandments.
But, keeping "commandments" sounds so odd these days; people think they are strange.
You can't worry about what others think.  They are not Me - I Am.

I promise you, if you abide in Me, I will abide in you..
And you will bring forth much fruit.
This fruit includes love...

I tell you these things so your joy may be full.
This is my commandment that you love one another, just as I have loved you.
Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.

So me doing something for someone so they will like or love me in return has nothing to do with love?
No, quite the contrary.
Doing that indicates you're doing it just for you. 
Remember, Christ gave His life so you might live, not so others would like or love Him.
He gave His life not for Him, but just for you.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

New Day

Photo by Adam
 Today is a new day, one for me.
Not to look back but to walk forward with Thee.
I look to You, you are my stay,
You are my fortress, each and every day.

Praise to Your name, You are my King and my Lord,
Something to forget I can never afford.

None are like You from beginning to end.
By You alone is the Great Plan pre-arranged.

Today is a new day, one in which You are beside.
Healing, leading and guiding through all that is prescribed.
I rejoice in You, I lift up a song of praise.
It is by You alone that I am raised.

Title: New Day
by: seedsower deb

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Left to Myself

"I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go." Psalm 32:8

Left to myself, I would surely die. Slow destruction with a final cry.

I'm learning, life firm in Jesus is the only way. To live life to its fullest without a destructive sway.

I can see myself when I am alone... There are times when I am not looking to and depending on You

I know Who is before me... And yet, at times, I still tend to wander down the wrong track.

God, I am full of things that squeeze You out. Empty me so I can be fully filled by You.

Guide and lead me, show me the way. Alone with myself, not acknowledging You, surely is an unsafe place.

Come, Holy Spirit, lead and direct me to that narrow way. I need You every second of every day.

How great Your love and forgiveness: That's who You are and Your full intent.

Left to myself... I shudder to think where my journey would end. Grateful that You are here to instruct and teach and lead me toward the right bend.

Title: Left to Myself
by: seed sower deb

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Choices Made

Choices made today,
Effect our tomorrows.

No going back.
Firmly I sit,
Knowing I am,
Securly in,
The middle of His hand.

Eternally grateful.

Title: Choices Made
by: seedsower deb

Friday, May 15, 2009

Serving Thee

The longer I live,
I realize how little I know.

Over the years, I've faced small things here and there.
But nothing to compare to the "great cloud of witnesses,"
whose lives You ensured were penned in Your Book.

No mouths of lions have I had to face,
Or bears which I've had to chase and tear,
No fiery furnace have I had to enter,
No stake on which to be tied, for the purpose of being burned alive,
Nor have I faced being sawn asunder.

The things I do face,
Minuscule as they be,
I take comfort in You,
You are there for me.

One thing I have learned and gratefully know,
Never will You leave me, never will You go.

Always with me...

  • comforting,
  • supporting,
  • providing,
  • leading,
  • guiding, and
  • even carrying.

  • You call me friend; You say I am precious, your beloved; You call me your child.
    Oh for a heart that fears Your name.

    For no one can serve two masters.
    A man can be devoted to only one.
    To the other he will despise and display horrid contempt.

    ...for it is written and it is known.

    Thee I will serve...

    ...whether I am healed or not,
    ...whether I master this or that,
    ...whether I fail or succeed,
    ...whether my finances improve or stay their lot.

    You are my stay, You make the way,
    You are my life, my light, my song.

    I bow before you,
    You hold the key,
    To my moments, my days,
    For all eternity.

    Faithful to the call,
    Doing whatever You desire...
    ...Great or small,
    ...Known by others, or not.

    To find myself kneeling...
    Before You on that Blessed day,
    Will be more glorious than any words can convey.

    Title: Serving Thee
    by: seedsower deb


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    Sunday, May 10, 2009

    Seeing the Unseen

    I arise today and do the next thing.

    My duty is clear...
    Honor the King.

    Many things I desire,
    Those things though are known...
    By the One Who sits upon the Great Throne.

    Things hoped for, not yet seen;
    If they were, there'd be no reason to hope.
    For why hope for something already gleaned?

    But I see the unseen, as if it were at my door.
    Patienty, I know it will arrive, at the appointed time.
    Not one minute late or before.

    He knows my needs before I ask.
    I will gratefully go about my day;
    Do the next thing... and bask.

    Title: Seeing the Unseen

    by: seedsower deb

    Thursday, April 30, 2009


    Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God...(1a)

    No one whose hope is in You will ever be put to shame. (2)

    "No one" - ah, this must surely include "me," as my hope is in God alone.

    After many of years of hiding, cowering, internalizing, losing sight of my very being, I now know that it is only He who can and will provide for me, keep me, protect me.

    What is it that I have "hope" of?... Oh, so very, very much:

    - Resurrection
    - Eternal life
    - His mercy
    - His grace
    - Everlasting love
    - His great and absolute power
    - His soverignty
    - His ability to turn a situation around
    - His providental care

    My "hope" is not one of "oh, I wish this would happen," or "I wish this would come true."

    No, resolutely, it is a simple "knowing." He is with me.

    May integrity and uprightness protect me, because my hope is in You. (3)

    Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. (4)

    Now shameless and protected, praising my Savior and my God... I raise my heart to the heavens:

    Why so downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? (1)

    Nay, I put my hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior (1) and I can for sure say, it does bring one an unexplainable, yet definate hope.

    1. Psalm 42:5/6a; 42:11; 43:5
    2. Psalm 25:3
    3. Psalm 25:21
    4. Psalm 62:5

    by: seedsower deb

    Friday, April 17, 2009

    Lamp Put Aside

    I got off track, simply put, because I put the Lamp aside.

    It is "Thy Word which is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path."

    But I simply put it aside... why would I? I ask myself...

    One day due to hurry, another day because of chaos, another because of this, another because of that.

    Duly, my sight grew dim... it's as if darkness has enveloped me.

    But God knows this.

    "Why was this man born blind? did he or his parents sin? Neither.
    ...this happended so that the work of God would be shown in his life."

    I would not dare compare my situation with that of being born blind,
    As my "blindness" has come by my own hand, or lack thereof.

    I can say, however, the work of God will be shown in my life.
    I know He has a plan for me, one that is to prosper me, not harm me.
    Plans to give me hope and a future.

    I have physical eyes with which to see things around me,
    But the eyes to the things of the spirit are dimmed,

    Oh to see again.

    He who is mighty can restore that sight.
    His desire is for me to glorify Him.

    Oh, I hear Him passing by...

    Jesus, I rise with a cry, have mercy on me...
    "What do you want Me to do for you?" He says...
    Lord, I want to see again.
    As to the blind man, to me, He mercifully replies "Receive your sight, your faith has healed you."

    Sunday, March 1, 2009

    Today I Choose

    Today I choose to be happy, content, and full of song.
    This is the only way to combat those things which are wrong.

    God is with me, that is all I need.
    I will go along happily, as I am His seed.

    He lifts me up when I am down.
    He keeps me afloat so I won't drown.
    He hovers over me with tender care
    How can anyone not be sustained with such fare.

    Today I choose to live with Him.
    To me I die.
    For me that's life.
    What riches and joy,
    Greater than any gem.

    Sunday, February 15, 2009

    It is Time to Turn My Eyes

    I say, “I cannot do this,”
    He says “but, you can.”
    He actually says you can do all things
    through Christ who strengthens you.

    I turn my eyes toward Him and
    His Word for I know He has a plan.

    It’s not one I can see right now,
    But I know it’s in the works.
    Because His Word says it is,
    I believe His Word.

    He actually says His Word was written to
    “Teach, rebuke, correct, and train”
    So that I may be “thoroughly equipped for
    every good work.”

    So, when I say “I cannot do this,”
    And He says “but, you can,”
    It is time for me to turn my eyes
    Away from me and toward Him.

    Tuesday, February 3, 2009


    pain of lonliness hurts
    pain of having no vision hurts
    pain of doing nothing ever hurts
    pain of having no desire hurts
    pain of being alone hurts
    pain of not having friends to go eat with and laugh with hurts
    pain of being by myself hurts
    pain of not having anyone to go anywhere with hurts
    pain of having a family but not doing anything together hurts
    pain hurts
    hurts pain
    hurts hurt
    I hurt

    Sunday, February 1, 2009

    Till Death Do I Part...

    I know my God is always near,
    Truely I have nothing to fear.

    No matter what is seen,
    or may be nigh,
    He's really no further than my side.

    I will keep my eyes set on Him,
    Not on the besetting troubles outside or within;
    Or the unknowns of what tomorrows may bring.

    Confusion trying to pry its way in.
    No, bent toward Him is where I'll stay;
    Only then can I really see,
    His glory.

    And to those things which try and keep me spent,
    So I will walk dazed and be discontent;
    Only to build resentment...
    are those things sent,

    To stuff down hurts, pain, and distress,
    Hoping I will walk a "life of death."

    These things I know are only lies,
    To keep my eyes from gazing on the Prize,
    To them I say goodbye.

    I know He is with me, mighty and sure,
    This is the truth that rings within
    and causes me to endure.

    To keep from the lies, I will come often to Him,
    Stretching, reaching, with every thread within,

    The truth of His presence, which is always near,
    rings deep, deep in my heart,
    This is the truth on which I will stand till "death do I part.",

    Tuesday, January 27, 2009

    What are You Waiting For? Get Up and Walk!

    For too many years I have been…
    sitting, laying, waiting;

    Exactly for what, I know not.
    Thinking maybe tomorrow my dream will arrive.
    Feeling, if I had only hoped, trusted, believed more. Had more faith.
    Maybe if I had behaved better, been different, smiled more, did more.
    I told myself, things then might have been better.
    So much disappointment, frustration, and strife.

    Looking back I'm sure it was me having hope in hope alone...
    Nothing really to do with...
    • "Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done"
    • “To gain your life you must lose it.”
    • “To live is Christ, to die is gain.”
    • "The just shall live by faith."
    • “Count it all joy my brethren when you fall into divers temptations.”
    • “In acceptance lieth joy.”

    No, I lived with my mind and heart filled with I hope...

    • this will get better...,
    • tomorrow will bring change...,
    • I hope things will be different.
    • Surely they will, they must.

    Yet, always awaking to a similar day.

    Then one morning, in my way,
    came the story about a man who lay
    By the sheep market pool ("Bethesda" that is, in the Hebrew tongue).

    There he lay, waiting for an angel to stir the waters,
    so he could make his way into the pool….
    The first one in the pool, you see, would be made whole,
    healed from all their infirmaties.

    The man there laid for thirty-eight long years,
    ...Waiting, hoping, believing that things would be better, in time.
    Laying there hoping someone would put him in,
    Thinking, tomorrow will bring a change, or
    Things will be different, surely they will, they must. . .

    The Great Physician, the Healer of all mankind
    Stopped before the man one day,
    He simply asked the man who laid,
    the hoping man, the desirous man…

    Do you want to be made whole? "Yes," the man said.
    Now, I do not know if it was a quiet, “Yes, only if I could,”
    or a loud “YES! man, of course. Can't you see I hurt!"

    But none the less, excuses were made... looking up he said,
    “no one cares;” “no one will help me, they just go about their business as if I were not even here;” “they really don’t care, how could they care?;” “if they did, they would help me get in those waters."

    Nothing said by the man phased the Healer...
    He just looked him square in the eye and said to the man... GET UP and WALK...

    Immediately, the man rose... and walk he did.
    and after laying by the waters all those years he found
    the waters had nothing to do with his becoming whole and free from his
    pain, his sickness, his despair.
    It was because of him doing "nothing" that put him in this way.... not looking to the One who knew him before he was formed in his mother's womb and had filled his lungs with the very breath of life.
    Nope, it was just him having hope in hope that someday something would change.

    My time for waiting,
    ...Thinking tomorrow my dream might arrive.
    ...Hoping someone would come along and make everything alright.
    ...Feeling, if I had only hoped, trusted, believed, more.
    ...Maybe if I had behaved better, been different, smiled more, did more,
    has come to an end.

    I have now have heard the words... GET UP, WALK...

    So doing the next thing is what I plan to do.
    I will depend on "Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done." For without Him, I know I can do nothing.

    I will take one step today, my hand in His; forget yesterday; and let tomorrow stay in its place.

    My hope and trust will be in God alone. I will walk by faith, and know that my situation is under His watchful providential power and care. I cannot walk by sight of what I currently see, the situations before me.

    My dreams are all filled with Him… His imminent return, His power at work in me, and His protection, guidance, and deliverance.

    In Him alone do I put my hope and trust.

    The disappointment, frustration, and strife I have faced,
    Now dissipates with knowing I make my plans, yet God directs my steps.
    It is Him alone who will keep my pace and help me face
    …all that comes my way.

    But the best part is I will be walking along in my journey and not stuck waiting, lying beside the sheep market pool... disappointed, hopeless, frustrated, and filled with pain and strife.

    Saturday, January 24, 2009

    Patience Having Her Perfect Work

    Patience must have her perfect work in me,

    In order for me to be mature, complete, and totally free.

    It is the crown of life that is promised to them,

    Those who endure through trials... And who love Him... the end.

    Thursday, January 22, 2009

    When All Is Said and Done

    When all is said and done
    A person stands alone.

    At the end of time
    there s/he'll be,
    standing still
    in front of Thee.

    Choices made,
    Days since laid,
    No going back,
    No retract.

    Let me "do" today
    unto You.

    I know it all comes down to
    me and You.

    Live my life to revere Your name.
    Frequently quicken me,
    My ear turned to Thee,
    My heart tied to...
    Your desire.

    When all is said and done,
    It comes down to me before Thee...
    An "Audience of One,"
    Oh Lord, that I will have glorified the Son.

    Friday, January 9, 2009

    Prisoner By Choice

    I am tired of pain,
    The emotional kind.
    My heart feels empty,
    Spite clouds my mind.

    Wishing for happy,
    Fun-filled days.
    I only go about in a fog-filled haze.

    I am tired of hurting,
    the emotional kind.

    I see nothing genuine,
    I feel only painful grinds.

    I have an enemy who hates me.
    Never a kind word to spare.
    The accuser of the brethren.
    For sure it's only what's in it for him.
    That's his only care.

    But what about me?
    Whose heart do I seek?
    To be kind to others, despite all, stay meek?
    Do I seek the One's who died for me?
    Or try and comfort my own heart?
    Tis the latter.

    Why do I stay in this state,
    Why won't I go?
    I really can't answer
    I'm too numb to know.
    Too caught up.

    I see others living, loving,
    Why can't I?
    Nothing to laugh about.
    Much though to cry.

    I want to be free
    I want to have fun
    I want to have a purpose
    Living as promised by the Son.

    I don't.
    It's my choice.
    Misery, oppression, obsession.
    That's where I'm at.

    God help me to be free,
    I do not know how;

    I am full of anger, hurt, pity, unforgiveness.
    Because of this... prisoner by choice.

    Yes, freely You give, freely I can receive... but I've got to forgive first, and then...

    " break free from this, in my anguish cry to the the LORD, for He will answer me by setting me free. The LORD is with me; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?" Psalm 118:5-6 (NIV)

    Ah, I am my own worst enemy,
    Held as prisoner, by choice.

    Thursday, January 8, 2009

    So What About Tomorrow?


    "So What About Tomorrow" was co-written by Seedsower Deb and Marlene Hoenig.

    Today, I shall not worry about tomorrow,
    As it is not promised to me.

    God's Grace is sufficient for today,
    And there is no Grace set aside,
    from which I can borrow.

    "No, we aren't promised tomorrow, But know that we are loved TODAY and forever, in spite of what this world throws our way."1

    He asks that I be anxious for nothing, rather with thanksgiving,
    I'm to watch and I pray.

    His peace, all understanding passes,
    Keeps my mind on Him,
    And my heart in certain array.

    For as today is,
    So shall my strength be.
    And I know for sure,
    He will supply my need.

    1. quote pulled from writings of Marlene Hoenig, Director of Eye of the Storm Ministries

    Saturday, January 3, 2009

    Faith Shields by God's Power

    Through faith I am shielded by God's mighty power,
    From now until that final hour.

    That final hour when Christ is revealed,
    Revealed to us us all, no longer concealed.

    Regardless of nation, race, sex, or gender,
    All will witness His glorious splendor.

    Doubt will vanish and scepticism will flee,
    As all will bow before Him on bended knee.

    It will be at that time the Mighty will say,
    To those whose trust is in the blood of He,

    It is time my child,
    Come enter into My presence for eternity.

    What I am is Plain to God

    What I am is plain to God (2 Cor 5:11b NIV)

    I can only trust my Lord for today.

    For tomorrow is not yet promised,
    And, yesterday, is a memory, but past.

    Today, I sense an emptiness, an unkowing, an uncertainty.

    Oh may I not be pulled about by doubt and fear,
    I must stand my ground,
    Trust my God,
    I know He's near.

    Flee emptiness - for greater is He who is in me than he that is in the world,
    Be gone unknowingness - for though I make my plans, God directs my steps.
    Crawl away uncertainty - for He who began a good work in me will complete it until the day of Christ Jesus.

    Depending on His strength, peace, and wisdom coming down from above,
    I'm told to be "therefore wise as a serpent, and harmless as a dove." (Matthew 10:16).

    This shall I be by His power and grace.
    Searching my heart to surrender all...

    ...that brings Him disgrace.

    For what I am is plain to God.
    Though I groan with a longing to be clothed with my heavenly dwelling,
    I know while here, I have His Spirit as a heavenly deposit.
    May I live by faith and not by sight...

    ...for what I am is plain to God.

    Friday, January 2, 2009

    Strengthened by Grace

    It started as I walked in the door...

    Why did you do this, why didn't you do that?

    I tried to defend, but the voice wouldn't hear,
    I initially shrunk back, not recognizing fear.

    Alone in my 'safe' room, atop of my bed,
    I buried my face toward the wall and I said:

    O' God, please help me see You in this fire;
    Grant me grace to rise from this mire.

    More important, give me strength to keep my mouth closed ,
    As I know I can do nothing without You.

    It's only through You I can do all things,
    As you are the Vine and I the branch.

    Strengthened by grace, I went about the night,
    Going about my evening, not looking for a fight.

    As I truly desire no argument, no contention,
    For I am an Ambassador for Christ within.

    Help me to display Christ, to stand firm
    Not to rely on myself, but on Him.

    Help me to always stand, for You have delivered me, You deliver me, and You will continue to deliver me.

    Lord help me to live for You Who died for me (2 Cor 5:15), help me to not regard anyone from a worldly view (2 Cor 5:16),
    But to always stand and believe solidly in You.

    Firm in your arms as You see me through.

    Train My Brain?

    Train my brain? How is that so?
    By "sync'ing" with Him,
    Who'll ensure it will grow.

    Stretching, reaching, I emerse my thoughts deep in Him...
    Trusting, believing and my mind begins to bend;

    To the conformity...
    ...of His Son.

    My heart and soul by Him was won,
    Bought by Him with His shed blood.
    His plan all along?

    Surley it was.
    My brain designed to glorify Him,
    to love others and have peace within.

    Wednesday, December 31, 2008

    O' That I Would Love You

    "Unite my heart to fear Thy name." (Psalm 86:11b)

    O' that I would love You.
    You Who are in me and I am in You.

    Your Word says this is so.
    But my life tells a different woe.
    Lord, let my journey begin,
    To turn,
    Before it is time to end.

    The path and fields have become too much.
    The constant contention, raging are too much.

    My very own actions are killing me.
    I do not know how to flee.

    I've heard it said,
    'when the glory of the Lord fills a place there is no room for anything else'

    O' Father that Your glory would show on my face.

    I sit at your feet knowing I can do nothing to earn Your love.

    Help me to Obey You in order to walk in Your way.

    Help me Lord,
    I must stop blaming my nasty "be" attitudes on someone else,

    I must believe You in all things and for all things,
    And stop the doubting, and complaining,
    Talking about, thinking about how things should be done and blaming.

    I say I am the only one who walks and lives like this...
    But, now You remind me of others in a previous place in time....
    As with the Israelites, my thinking is keeping me stuck in the wilderness of my own demise.

    I come to You now, seeking You.

    "Unite my heart to fear Thy name" (Psalm 86:11b)

    O that I would love You,
    You Who are in me and I am in You.

    By Grace and Power Can I Live

    Only by Your power and grace can I live
    Help me today of my life to give.

    So that this vessel which I fill
    Is empty of me
    and filled with You
    Who lives.

    Help me today to surrender all
    Surrender all I say
    All to Jesus this very day.

    Full surrender to You
    Total abandonment
    And trust in you
    It must be you.

    Help me to see Thee
    Only Thee
    Balance me.

    Help me to fear Thy name
    which is "...the beginning of wisdom and the

    knoweldge of the holy is understanding." (Proverbs 9:10)

    Thy will be done
    Full surrender

    And trust in You.

    Only by Your power and grace can I live
    Help me today of my life to give.

    Thursday, December 18, 2008

    Free to Be Me?

    The teacher said,"the brain can be trained."
    Hmmm, thought I, "Can this be true?"

    On he continued...

    "You see, your brain was configured by God,
    So we can think on Him and live life in peace and harmony.
    In the Garden of Eden, at the beginning of time,
    There was no pain, no dissension, only unity and joy divine."

    Train the brain still I thought? Hmmm, does this hold the key... along with the Spirit who now dwells within me?

    The key for me to be united, disciplined, and sync'd with He?

    Will this let me be the me He intended when He created me?

    Regardless of the pain, grief, and heartaches that tend to...come my way.

    Sure, with His Word at hand, a quiet heart, and my mind turned toward Him, it is then I can hear his voice;
    Through all of this, He ensures my mind will be transformed,
    To the conformity of His Son.

    Okay, I say, a brain can be trained, with both sides working in unison.

    I immerse my thoughts deep in Him, The Word,
    Trusting, believing, my mind begins to conform... Toward a mind like His.

    My heart and soul by Him was won.
    Bought with His blood.
    His plan all along.

    My brain truly was designed to think on Him,
    Having the potential to believe, have faith, and be disciplined;
    To love Him above all others, love one another, and have peace and joy within.

    So yes, I say my brain can be trained.
    So I can be free to be me and united with Thee.
    To have the mind of Christ.

    For it is freedom Christ came, and whom the Son sets free is indeed free.
    Free to be the me that person He intended me to be.

    I am exiting now from the widened road that keeps me so distracted and traveling so

    I can now begin to travel the narrow path which moment by moment will lead me so Him. Training the brain to be in sync with Him.

    What a journey... free to be me which He intended all along.

    Tuesday, December 9, 2008

    Freedom and Glory

    Freedom and Glory
    by: seedsower deb

    Written at sunset on a beach in Tampa, Florida , USA

    I am amazed at the vastness of God's Glory reflected by the setting sun on the water's surface and the freedom illustrated by birds soaring and diving through the air without a care.

    "From the rising of the sun to the going down of the same, the Lord's name will be praised."

    For me setting suns and soaring freedom do not always find my door; rather it is continual conveyors of threshing wheat, spinning clay on the Potter's wheel, and thrusting into fiery furnaces that I see.

    I love the Lord through all of these things. For I know there is a time for everything under the sun... as it is written.

    I accept postponement and the apparent temporary contradiction of promises...

    ...though they be nigh at my door. And the high place and the glory which peek from around the corner, they are just a matter of time. (As the Promiser is not a man that He can lie.)

    Whether it be threshed wheat in a bin, clay on the wheel, or burning heat in a fire, by His grace I will go. As for certain, as I am penning these words, He has a divine plan for me:

    • wheat separated for His glory,
    • clay molded into the vessel fit for His purpose,
    • burning heat removing all the dross.

    With joy, come what may, all is accepted. As in acceptance lieth joy. Though things can appear dimly, there is always that glimmer of hope from time-to-time and realization of the final hour when all will be clear and the temporary will pass into the eternal.

    Oh my Rock and my Fortress in You do I trust... for it is You who is my Stronghold.

    No more pain, no more tears, no more shrinking back. Only glory and freedom... basking in the actual presence of God, shining as the sun's rays flickering on the water's surface and the birds soaring freely in the air.